For Parent and Caregivers

Ten Tips | Getting Started | Ask the Experts
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Talking Starts Now! Ten tips

1. Seek out “teachable moments” where you can easily bring up the topic of sex without your child feeling like they are getting “the talk”
2. Remember: It is okay to feel uncomfortable, but your child needs to hear this information from you
3. Do not wait for your children to ask questions; begin the conversations about sexual health and sexuality early so your children know they can talk to you
4. Be “ask-able”; allow your child to be open with you without the fear that they may be punished or scolded for what they say. Also, let them know that you want to talk about these issues with them
5. Consider the “question behind the question”. What your child is asking you may only be the tip of the iceberg of what they want to know. Be aware that questions and comments about what “friends” are doing may actually be about themselves
6. Listen. Children will open up and talk to you if they know you are going to listen without interruption or judgment
7. Remember that facts are not enough. Children want to know where you stand on issues and what your values are. Be clear about what you want for them and what you feel are the healthiest choices
8. Talk about the joys of sexuality. Avoid making sex a “forbidden fruit” or creating shame around sexuality. We are all sexual beings that grow and develop throughout our lives so stay positive about your child’s sexuality
9. Keep in mind that you are talking to your children because you care about their happiness and well-being. End conversations with your child feeling glad that they talked to you
10. Know what is taught about sexuality in your schools, faith communities, and youth groups. Many parents assume that their children are getting the facts about pregnancy, sexually transmitted diseases and sex in school. In reality, many children get limited information about sexual health and sexuality in school and community groups.

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